"Lesbian epiphanies"

Jensen, K. L. (1999). Lesbian epiphanies : women coming out in later life / Karol L. Jensen, Harrington Park Press.

As with Dawkins, I did not pick up Jensen with any thought of incorporating her into my research question. But this is one book I am glad I picked up. In the back of my mind, vaguely, I could see the importance of considering child development theory in my work. It is a research area so far largely unexplored by me. Now, having read about the power of societal values and attitudes to profoundly impact upon basic self knowledge and identity, I realise that the question of the power of words is encompassed within a much broader and more complex picture than I had envisaged, one in which I cannot ignore the contributions of areas such as sociology and cultural studies.

Lesbian epiphanies of course relates to the development of sexual identity, and there is an interesting correlation with Dawkins. Dawkins describes the power of adults to shape the belief system of future generations, including for example, the doctrinal belief that women are the property of their husbands. Jensen’s work would suggest that such a belief is not as old fashioned as it may sound. She describes a complex paradox in which sexuality is perceived to be central to relationships, whilst at the same time taboo. The woman is “admonished to dress and paint for him, but is accused of inviting his attention when it comes” (p. 206). According to Jensen, the woman is encouraged to believe that sexuality relates specifically to the male, and her role is to fulfil him, rather than to seek fulfilment of her own, wherever that may lie.

I struggle sometimes to see exactly how she supports her critical analysis, but the picture presented is an alarming one, seeking to account for the fact that a surprising number of women do not even discover their sexual identity until after marriage. She uses the word “script” to describe the overall experience of cultural values which may influence the ability to develop self knowledge, creating an image of values as language: “The power of the social force to marry creates a script for women’s lives that is so powerful that their own internal messages can be, and sometimes, are, overwhelmed” (p. 206).

This quote represents a potential departure from Dawkins in that it explicitly sets up a tension between that which is innate to an individual, and that which forms part of the external “script” that the individual reads in an attempt to negotiate life and social interaction. More than merely imprinting the unfinished child, for Jenkins, social values can have the effect of actually overwriting innate traits or potentialities. This, presumably, is in fact the hope of many morally didactic lessons. And yet, without a great deal changing in the external world, events, relationships and ideas, both large and small, accumulate until for some at least, the “authentic” individual finally emerges from the social construct.

In my reading from years ago, one of my confusions related to the surprising amount of power apparently accorded to subversive literature: a complete religious upbringing and regular exposure to the Bible, could, according to many texts I read, be overturned in an instant by the mere act of reading Harry Potter or His dark materials. Jensen’s work would appear to suggest a solution to this puzzle. If the child’s innate nature is not simply created through moral and social education but overwritten, there is the possibility that the overwrite may not be complete. Fear of words then becomes fear of the fire that is damped but never fully quenched. The text of identity may appear to be successfully overwritten, but life is a hacker, and the never-fully-erased original text is forever in danger of being exposed, to the discomfiture of those who would wish it otherwise.